so I've been thinking that lately I've been a mess. like a real mess. my car needs a wash, vacuum..etc. my room is crazy, clothes everywhere ..and that's pretty normal. But I used to be so precise, I still sorta am I'm probably just going through a phase. But I used to be a lot more neat and organized. But as I was rummaging through my room for an hour tryna find my favorite leggings. I stepped back and thought, " holy shit I'm stressed out about leggings ". So I'm writing this cause I gave up on looking for those fucking leggings. Cause I stopped and realized that at one point in my life the only thing I had control over was how clean and organized my room and car was.  Everything was a crazy mess, and it's not like it's so perfect right now, but it's definitely better than it was before. I still stress out about things, but I've learned to just kinda breath. Some days are gray some days are better. But ive come a long way and right now those fucking leggings are my are my stress ball. ugh.